Swinger

NJ's first solo spin on the big-girl swing wasn't the most exciting thing ever, but dang if she don't look good in them shades, huh? (Be sure to watch through the end, the shadow in the lower left has a special hand sign for you.)

This looks like a lot more fun when other kids are doing it, Daddy.

Glenda The Good Witch Was A Child Once, Too, Right?

NJ put her Halloween costume on this past weekend for a reunion with four other toddlers who were about to be born when their parents all met at a Lamaze training weekend in late June 2009. (Worst. Sentence. Ever. I know. I'm listening to the new Tom Waits and feeling a little semi-discombobulated.) (Semi-discombobulated in a good way.) Here's what she looks like this season dressed as, in her words, a "butterfly witch":

I told Mommy and Daddy I'd turn them into pumpkins if I didn't get a cookie. I TOLD THEM!

The butterfly witch partied with a monster, an octopus, a bumblebee and a butterfly. Everyone had a grand time, as far as I know, and our hostess deserves a hearty round of applause. It's been really nice to watch our kids grow up simultaneously for the past two years -- why, it seems like just yesterday blah blah blah. All the parents are good people and it's fun to compare how our kids are growing up, get advice (POTTY TRAINING was a big topic), brag on your angel and listen to them brag on theirs.

NJ scarfed a couple of muffins, threw a mini-tantrum when the notion of sharing a toy didn't appeal to her, did a lot of charming stuff, and changed out of her dress and into clothes more appropriate for outdoor play:

Don't you just hate it when an octopus blocks your way on the slide?

This year will be NJ's first experience with trick-or-treating on the block, and I'm looking forward to it more than she is (obviously, because she doesn't know now to read a calendar yet, but still). For years I've been opening my door, dishing out candy, and looking over the kids' heads to the sidewalk. Where the parents stand, beaming and watching their little one get gifted with handfuls of sugar.

Speaking of candy -- don't skip any two-story houses (last item on list).

Princess Sunshine

We started out with the best of intentions today, getting in gear early enough to hit a farm for some animal-related fun, then have a nice lunch out, then get home in time for NJ's nap. At which point The Wife and I were supposed to plot out a fantastically fun thing to do in the late afternoon. It was gonna be great!

Things started to look iffy when we left Seattle, which was gray but dry, and crossed to the east side of Lake Washington, where it was much grayer. And wet. And when we got to Issaquah, which we had to drive through to get to the farm, we ran headlong into Salmon Days, which shuts down a pretty big chunk of the town. Long story short, we ended up driving around for almost 90 minutes. For NJ, of course, that's 90 minutes of sitting in her car seat behind us. My heart went out to her.

My heart went out to her so much, in fact, that after we had lunch, I made sure she got a mini-cupcake for dessert. She loved this, and I think it bought The Wife and I a fair amount of goodwill.

At home, the end of NJ's nap coincided rather unfortunately with the start of a football contest waged by the Good Guys, so I was out of contact for a while. (Hey, they only play 12 or 13 games a year. Give me a break.) The Wife and NJ ran to the supermarket, and when they got home I one-eye-on-NJ-one-eye-on-the-Horns'ed it for a while. As dinner approached, the cupcake goodwill must have run out. She got a little tetchy, and once dinner was served she chowed down something fierce. Then bath, stories, milk, and bedtime. All went smoothly.

Point being, The Wife and I let NJ down today in the things-to-do department, and she ended up bored out of her mind. Still, though, she was a heck of a trooper, maintaining her Good Girl status most all day long. Lots of smiles and laughter and overall good-naturedness. So good-natured that, at the supermarket, she did things like this:

When life gives you pumpkins, make pumpkinade.

Hopefully we'll come through tomorrow with an action-packed day of adventure for her. Or, at the very least, a couple of min-cupcakes.

Abso-fruit-ly!

When I suggested to The Wife that she take NJ out to the backyard and pick up the pears that had started to fall from the tree, she assumed it was a cynical ploy on my part to get them to do that chore instead of me. Sure, she was right about that, mostly. But I also thought it'd be fun for the kid.

And it was! She scooped up a bunch of "pay-ears" and found a couple of nice, clean, healthy pears she wanted to eat. I joined them (after the hard work was done, natch) and lifted NJ up so she could pluck a couple of fruits from the branches. NJ dug that a great deal.

Once inside, hands and pears all washed, she enjoyed the fruits (literally! Ha!) of her labor.

All the sweeter because I picked it myself, Daddy. All the sweeter.

Maybe the kid needs a butter churn or a pasta maker for Christmas.

Garden Gnome

Her garden-centric grandmother is coming to visit tomorrow, so NJ used the Memorial Day weekend to get some of her planting done.


That thumb she's always sucking turns out to be ... green.

She points to the window box and exclaims "My garden" whenever she sees it now. Next up, I plan to teach her to use the lawnmower.

Someone Get That Girl A Harpoon

After two beautiful, spring-has-dadgum-sprung Seattle days, it was only fitting that Saturday was dreary and overcast. That didn't stop us from heading out to a lovely little Queen Anne park. Once I mopped up the standing water on the end of the slide with a diaper from NJ's bag, she spent a good ten minutes doing what you can see in this two-minute clip. I've posted slide vids before, but I like this one because it encapsulates everything that's going around here lately, namely: boundless energy, lots of toddlerbabble, and a growing independence and determination to do things for herself. She kicks things off with an old favorite, though -- bringing all the lively action to a grinding halt and becoming non-photogenic as soon as Dad Solo whips out the camera.


Repetition is beauty.

After that NJ climbed on another play structure and did some dancing (no photos or video, sadly) and hung out with her mom. She also pretended to be on a whaling ship just off the coast of Nantucket in the 1840s. Or, maybe I was pretending that she was pretending to be on a whaling ship. Whichever it was (Psssst: It was the latter.), it made for some cute photography.

Batten down the hatches! Make sure the port-side cullery is skanded close to the torlator! Any slippage means the jib will deploy wide and loose, so the entire stern could mandilate out of control! Arrggh! Starboard! Ahoy, ahoy!

After this, the kid was gifted with some crayons and books, and then a delicious brunch at Barrio before heading home for a long, satisfying nap.

Kayak Kween

Yesterday we went to REI, and NJ decided to forgo watching me try on shoes in favor of playing in the kiddie area. Specifically, the kayak:

Someone get a paddle in my hands and water under this thing so I can get going.

We've made it a habit to get out as much as we can on the weekends, but this weekend ended up being lunch out each day (here yesterday, here earlier this afternoon -- NJ loves their guac, and will be eating her leftover fish taco for dinner in a little while) and yesterday's REI appearance. The weekend weather's been cold/wet/gray for a while now, so outdoor fun opportunities are somewhat limited.

The Wife just left for an overnight in Portland and wasn't too thrilled to be leaving her daughter behind for the first time in many months. It's the first time I'll have NJ all to myself since she's become a walking, almost-talking terror, so we'll see how it goes. Hopefully it goes well, because there The Wife has another trip planned next week.

Time to go.

Duck My Life

We took our quack-quacking NJ to Green Lake this afternoon for a little bread-on-duck action. We've done it a couple of times already and she loves to watch the ducks, seagulls and other waterfowl in a feeding frenzy, as long as one of her parents is tossing the food -- as you'll see below, she's not much on throwing bread herself. Never passing up a chance to mentor my wide-eyed-with-wonder, ever-learning child, I delicately took a piece of bread from her hand and tossed it into the water for the birds. "See, like this!" I added helpfully. She only stopped crying once The Wife handed her another piece.



Once we were out of bread I walked Zeus around a bit while The Wife and NJ (her new chunk of bread still lodged in her pudgy hand) walked along the lake and kept company with the ducks. I saw that the kid was heading straight for a sizable rain puddle and thought "Uh-oh, those boots are going to get soaked." They did get soaked -- and so did a lot more of NJ's ensemble when she executed a Fatty Arbuckle-esque pratfall into the water, landing squarely on her fanny and not seeming to mind all that much. Sadly, the camcorder was already stashed away in her diaper bag, but here's a little photographic evidence to help us remember it forever:

Now, it's true I told NJ I loved the blues and hoped one day she'd get into Muddy Waters, but this isn't what I had in mind! Thank you, thank you very much -- I'll be here all week. Try the veal, and don't forget to tip your waitress.

We packed up the car and drove the now-pantsless kid home, where she continued to quack-quack for a bit, but then turned to other pursuits. Namely, marching around her room with a frog puppet on one hand, held defiantly in the air like she was a member of the 1968 Olympic relay team -- but cheerier, of course. There also were bubbles blown, laughed at, chased and burst. All in all, I think she had a pretty nice afternoon. And once she gets the connection between tossing the bread and seeing a duck feeding frenzy, I think she's going to be tossing a whole lot of bread.

Snow Fun! Wait, what ...? Oh. It's No Fun. Ah, OK.

To what I'm sure will be the delight of NJ's southern-most grandparents, we found out today that she's not all that much into the Winter Wonderland scene. Not into it at all, really. Nope, not at all.

Of course, the temperature was a nipple-killing 28 degrees when we were outdoors a few moments ago. Still, her distaste for all things wintry started before we went outside, when she was slipped into her new (to her) winter jumpsuit like a hot dog wiener into its bun, if the bun was super-tight and zippered and Velcro-ed closed. And then there were the mittens. And the hat.

No, Daddy, I'm not helping you shovel. Forget it.

The Wife took her across the street to meet a faceless snowman, but NJ was fairly unimpressed.

I don't get it -- this guy has no mouth, so how is he supposed to tell me how smart and adorable I am? I'm wasting my time here.

By the time we ventured back across the street to meet a snowwoman wearing a grass skirt and shades, NJ'd had enough.

Seriously, it's colder than a witch's meal delivery device out here. Can we please go back inside? Like, now?

Today, like yesterday, all three of us have been home thanks to the snow, ice and Seattle's legendary inability to cope with either. The forecast says the mercury will rise above freezing in two days, but then it's likely to snow some more. So this could be the worst week of NJ's young life, or she'll get used to it and be a regular snow bunny by this time next week. Meanwhile, this is what's going on -- The Wife and I trying to get work done while simultaneously entertaining and keeping an eye on a 15-month-0ld whose walking skills seem to improve hourly.

See what I did, Daddy? She put down the laptop and picked up this book! I've always known that I rule your lives, but now I think I'm really going to start taking advantage of it.

Four Legs Good, Two Legs Bad

Yesterday we were casting around for something to do, and a friend's Facebook endorsement led us to the Fairbank Animal Farm in nearby Edmonds. It was drizzly, and NJ is between raincoats at the moment (outgrew one, ordered another that hasn't arrived yet), but half the attractions are indoors, so we put a hat and one of her grandmother-knitted thick sweaters on her and made a go of it. It was fun -- and all new to NJ, who is a little city slicker -- and will be even more so when we return on a sunny day and don't have to scurry from covered area to covered area. Which, given that we're in Seattle, might be next spring.

First off was the duck pen, where I tossed some feed by the fence to bring the duck closer to NJ:

My daddy says 'Duck Soup' is one of his favorite movies, but I haven't seen it so I don't know if it's actually about, you know, duck soup. Anyway, you're probably safe as long as you stick close to me.

Then, it was inside the barn to see some livestock, as well as more poultry. NJ met a couple of sheep (not pictured) and two calves. She greeted one calf with the two-hands-on-the-ribcage move that has not exactly endeared her to the Two Idiots at home, and it didn't go over too well at the farm, either. This calf had been relaxing on the floor until NJ showed up.

This rump roast looks a little tough and stringy -- stew meat, maybe? Or a couple of nice chicken-fried steaks?

Then, NJ made way for ducklings (ha ha, get it?):

Let's take them all home. They can stay in my room.

At the chick incubator, NJ wantonly ignored the "do not tap on the glass" sign and tapped on the glass. Thankfully, the barn attendant missed it, and no chicks fell over dead with little chick heart attacks.

Because I'm a renegade and rules are for suckers. That's why.

Lastly, we stopped in an end of the barn that's reserved for frolicking in hay. NJ did some frolicking.

Farm subsidies for everyone! Hooray!

On the drive home, NJ crashed hard. She'd skipped her morning nap, and it was a little after noon -- nap time at day care. (Her transition from two naps a day to one at day care has really messed up her sleep habits and is the root of some of her late-afternoon crankiness -- something I stupidly forgot to mention in the "NJ's sleep" section here.) The Wife and I were able to stop at Burgermaster and eat in the car while she dozed. Parking and coming to a stop woke her up, of course, but she busied herself with a book while The Wife and I scarfed burgers, shakes, french fries (her) and onion rings (me). Because she's a good kid who loves her parents.

Sleep tight, Farmer NJ.

Sophie The Giraffe: 2009-2010

May she rest in peace.

Sophie the Giraffe was lost Tuesday, July 13, 2010, somewhere on The Circuit, the daily walk her owner, NJ, and her owner's father take when the weather is nice. Sophie proved an invaluable friend to NJ, who regularly gnawed on her head and feet and thrilled to her squeak. Sophie could usually be found on the dining room table, in NJ's diaper bag, in NJ's stroller or on the coffee table. The rubber giraffe had been lost numerous times before, most recently on Friday in downtown Portland, Oregon, but up until Tuesday had always been recovered and cleaned.

When asked about the loss of Sophie, NJ said: "Brab. Baden baden daden, oooyeeee urh. Dorg."

Sophie the Giraffe is survived by a freezable teething butterfly, a round rattle, a small teddy bear wearing a Texas Longhorns shirt, and a small, pink, stuffed dog named Puppy. She will be replaced immediately by another, identical Sophie the Giraffe.

Mouthy Little Kid

A partial list of things that have found their way into NJ's piehole lately:

• Black olives (off Dad Solo's slice at Zeek's for lunch yesterday -- yum)
• Dog hair (straight off Willie the Lab's back -- yech)
• Tooth No. 2
  
• Blades of grass (Dad Solo likes to pluck a blade and tickle NJ's nose and ears with it; she puts a stop to that by grabbing it away and trying to eat it)
• Small flowers (can't play outdoors without trying to eat a little vegetation)
  
• Small leaves (they get tracked into the basement on our shoes)
• Sippy cups (NJ's very adept with these, but doesn't get it right 100 percent of the time)
• Dad Solo's electric toothbrush (Good times. Good times.)

Gaping maw? I'll show you a gaping maw!